I remember walking into a new job 20 years ago. I was a young, ambitious professional, full of self-confidence in my position and capabilities. Shortly after my first day, I had to discuss a proposal with my boss - a 60-year-old German gentleman named Gary. Before we discussed anything about the technical aspects of my plan, he sat down and reviewed my written words, much as a high-school English teacher would. Except that this was much worse! I felt belittled and angry. Especially because Gary was right.
Learning to write again:
Over the next 10 years of working with Gary, I learned to understand his commitment to finding the right words. As a young German landing in Canada with no English and shortly after the war, things were very hard for him. Gary worked hard and realized the power of words. He appreciated, as a non-native English speaker, the subtle differences between words. And in business writing and contracts, those differences can be astonishing. I saw him win a $35 thousand lawsuit because he changed one word of a proposal months before the problem arose! That word had lots of power.
I still remember and value the lessons he taught me. I learned English from this wise, old, German. As he taught me, my written words still get edited, and now days run through an online grammar checker, before seeing the light of day. Words do have power.
Spoken words:
But what about spoken words? Words in the middle of a speech or conversation. Fleeting, ethereal, and usually unimportant in their specificity. Until they are not.
Have you ever said anything that you regretted? I have. Have you accidentally hurt someone's feelings by not thinking through your word choice or context? Or worse.
When words have unintended consequences:
Don Cherry, a Canadian sportscaster, recently made the headlines with his divisive and exclusionary comments about newcomers to Canada. As a privileged white male, he may not have understood how insensitive his word choices are. He gave a televised speech about being disappointed in the number of poppies he saw displayed on people's clothing for Remembrance Day. His choice of the words "You people" created a backlash that cost him his reputation and his job. Imagine if he had given almost the same speech using inclusive words such as "Everybody" and "We all." The interpretation would have been entirely different without a negative outcome. Two words in his speech were the most divisive. His words had power.
And so, we must learn to speak well and choose our words carefully. We have all heard someone say something that we groan at (or worse). And we need to be cautious to avoid choosing words that we don't mean. A simple turn of phrase can make a difference. The subtleties of words change everything.
Gary was right. Words do have power. And I am so glad he took the time to teach me that valuable lesson.